a chip off the old bloc

Today’s reflection - So very frustrated!

This video series is good, but I have to keep rewatching them while working on the exercises to fully comprehend everything. Sometimes I’ll watch them a few times before working on the exercise, and then have to rewatch it multiple times during the exercise.

1. Introduction Done

2. Running Ruby Done

3. Numbers and Strings Done

4. Variables and Objects Done

5. Self Done

6. Methods Done

7. Classes Done

8. Attributes Done

9. Arrays Done

10. Objects Interacting Done

11. Separate Source Files Done

12. Unit Testing Done

13. Conditionals and TDD — can’t get Rspec to work to finish this >_<

14. Modules

15. Blocks

16. Symbols and Structs

17. Hashes — watched videos up to this section multiple times but can’t do the exercises so I’m losing comprehension (and therefore steam…)

This leaves the following to finish:

18. Custom Iterators

19. Input/Output

20. Inheritance

21. Mixins

22. Distribution

23. Wrap Up

…along with all of my Rails tutorials. STILL. I clicked through it and it’s a lot of information. No clue how I can get this done in a few days at the pace I’m going. Either I’m operating with a few screws loose or….oh I don’t know. I can’t think straight anymore. Is something wrong with me? Is anyone else out there moving this slowly? Maybe there should be some sort of aptitude test for the Bloc program.

My stress level is high, both to the class and due to external factors.

Personal factors - I have a really important/intense job decision to finalize by the end of next week which requires some working knowledge of the material covered in this course (cue stress) along with full relocation (another stressor…). In addition I haven’t gotten to most of my freelance work all week either (an immediate stressor). My estimation is that between Monday and Saturday I’ve worked probably 65 hours on class material. (The minimum time we were supposed to set aside was 25. How is it that in 65 hours I can’t retain or comprehend much of anything??? Just the sheer volume alone should have skewed my understanding higher…) However, I’ve clocked 4.5 hours on paid projects this week. That left 31.5 hours for things like sitting in traffic, traveling/flying, showering, eating, and running twice. Rent is now a bit iffy but my other expenses will be covered…thank goodness for the piggy bank. (I was anticipating being able to work the other 20 hours a week but I gave it up to do and redo and redo all of this reading/studying.) Now, if my time investment was being actualized in actual complete comprehension, I feel that my stress level would be decreased.

Class factors - The fact that I’m not completely understanding everything compounded by the fact that I feel pressured to finish the rest of the material with not enough time is really weighing heavily on my psyche right now. I realize that there’s a long term benefit to all of this but at this precise moment, my immediate level of freaked-the-shit-out is taking a huge precedence.

Conclusion - Here’s hoping I can get a fresh start again tomorrow in the morning since my brain is fried for the day. I’m starting to feel like a complete asshat. I might just need to decompress…